Aren't you just amazed when a series a series of things happen to you in a day , and you realize later how beautifully they were all connected?.. it happens to me all the time.
i started reading a book today by Krishnamurti(see pic above and below) and i found the following paragraph. since i can never match up to Krishnamurti's talent of explaining philosophy, i was quoted him directly, and i dint want to interpret his message for you ,because it would just have been another distortion for your mind to rationalize .


" The teachers, the gurus, the mahatmas, the philosophers, have all led us astray, because actually we have not solved our problems, our lives are not different. We are the same miserable, unhappy, sorrow-laden people. So the first thing is never to follow another, including the speaker. Never try to find out from another how to behave, how to live. Because what another tells you is not your life. If you rely or depend on another you will be misled.

But if you deny the authority of the guru, the philosopher, the theoretician - whether Communist or theological - then you can look at yourself, then you can find the answer. But as long as one relies and depends on another, however wise he may be, one is lost. The man who says he knows, does not know. So the first thing is never to follow another and that is very difficult because we don't know what to do; we have been so conditioned to believe, to follow." -- Jiddu Krishnamurti


When i finished reading this, i felt like completely rejecting Krishnamurti. i mean what the heck is he talking about. Surely Buddha is teacher, and i have been following him.... and i have learned so much!. sure enough, i soon became aware that my mind-made-self was reject what i read because that mind-created-illusion was being challenged, it was being led into thinking what it was doing is wrong, and it was diminishing, and being mocked at . and i quickly realized that there must be something right about what Krishnamurti said .Else, why would i be made to feel soo restless by my mind.?




I just went about by day just letting this contradiction of my philosophy and that of Krishnamurti's to reside in me, i did not react to it, i did not bother to rationalize it anymore. In the night just be i was going to retire to bed, i started reading a book, which happens to be an anthology of Buddhist verses from various teachings of the Buddha. And the second verse of the page i opened randomly was :

"Never fear what will become of you, depend on NO one. Only the moment you reject all help are you freed."--- Buddha.